Unforgiveness is a pretty arrogant sin, yet I still can’t forgive my daughter. There, I said it, the one thing I haven’t been able to say. I am struggling to forgive my adult daughter.

Tis’ the season, right? My daughter will be home for a week to celebrate the holidays, and I am struggling. It’s like having a terrorist in our home for a week. The thought of her coming home is depressing. She’s always plotting, planning, creating drama, and trying to find something to use against us later. I’m tired! This has been ongoing since she was a teenager…

I Discovered I Had Been in an Abusive Relationship For Years… With My Daughter

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People say love shouldn’t hurt. Is that still true if your child is hurting you? If a significant other did some of the things adult children do to parents, it would be considered abuse.

Emotional abuse is a way to control another person by using emotions to criticize, embarrass, shame, blame, or otherwise manipulate another person.

My name is Teresa and I’ve been abused. My abuser is my daughter. I have been lied to, talked about, disrespected, and betrayed. I have been shamed and blamed when I have expressed my feelings. I have been manipulated. Somehow, that still feels like…

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Maybe I wasn’t perfect. Perhaps things weren’t YOUR way. To me, you were a gift from above; and everything I did, I did for love.

I know it wasn’t easy for you. Your challenges began before me. From the perspective of your inner wounded child, I somehow became the enemy.

Your judgment has been painful, your betrayal even worse. But having to live without loving you would have been a bigger curse.

I don’t hold it against you. We have all done things while in pain. It’s what you continue that matters. It’s what you choose to change.

I could…

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My daughter has always had problems with truth and accountability. As a very young girl, she could lie while looking me directly in the eye and with a completely straight face. As a teenager, she added crocodile tears to her already perfected ability. As an adult, she states, lies in a very matter of fact; way. As if she came to this conclusion after careful consideration and discovered this “truth” in therapy. It’s scary the way I have watched this talent evolve. She could be an Oscar-winning actress.

Most of these lies aren’t even logical. Anyone can easily poke holes…

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I accepted and loved his kids as my own. I saw myself in his daughter, so I made sure to take her on mother/daughter dates, put her in dance classes, and teach her every; single thing I knew. I worked multiple jobs at once to support the family. I never did anything for our biological children that I did not do for his biological children. At times, I even made our biological children wait for something they needed because the older children complained more. I did everything I knew to do. I sacrificed my peace, happiness, finances, and health. …

Teresa Carter

Wife, mother, sister, niece, cousin, friend, confidant. Just trying to figure it all out.

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